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Peter's Wife

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Must Singles be Lonely?

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It was a frigid February morning as I arose and watched my breath hanging in the air before my eyes. I knew today’s priority had to be finding kerosene to heat my apartment. Oil delivery to Armenia had been limited this winter making kerosene purchases an exhausting hide-n-seek game. As I ate my chilly goat cheese and flatbread a host of thoughts joined me at the breakfast table; I really don’t like eating alone. Does anyone know my struggle? What if I freeze to death? Must I always be brave? Why do I have to do this alone? Who can help me? Where are my students when I need them? Why don’t I have a husband? Why won’t Thomas ask me out? Suddenly I was astounded at how a simple lack of kerosene led to utter loneliness and sadness.

Serving single on the foreign field has numerous benefits of ease, simplicity, flexibility, time and exciting adventurous possibilities. Singles tend to learn new languages, develop national friends and adapt to culture, more quickly and smoothly. Housing and travel options tend to be greater and expenses fewer.

But as in most things in life many pluses often include minuses. The solo servant needs to be aware of and prepared for periods of emotional and spiritual loneliness. I believe for many of us single workers, loneliness is not a constant state of being but more a feeling which comes in seasons and waves.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally, Single Women Tagged With: accountability, exhausted, lonely, planning

What PWs Should Remember

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We asked in our last newsletter, “What is one thing that PWs should remember?” We had some wonderful answers. We hope you enjoy the wisdom that was shared.

About Yourself:
“You can take God seriously; but don’t take yourself too seriously.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally, Marriage, Spiritual Life, Work--Cross Culturally Tagged With: circumstances, planning

Furlough- Fun or Frenzy

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Are you looking forward to furlough or dreading it? Probably it is a mixture of both those feelings. Since many PWs go on furlough during the summer, December seemed a good time to talk about furlough planning.

Your husband has probably already been emailing contacts to plan the itinerary. Email has made that process so much faster and easier.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally, Work--Cross Culturally Tagged With: Children, furlough, home visit, planning

Hubby’s Away

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In November, 1990 a group of PWs from various organizations met together for a monthly fellowship meeting. We talked about the problems we faced when our husbands were traveling. Some interesting problems were voiced in our small group.

The most common problem had to do with the shifting of roles when our husbands were going in and out. How the husband and wife responded to the separations greatly effected the adjustments they made. One lady’s husband had been gone on a three month trip. She gave him a week or more to ease back into his role as head of the home because she was sensitive to his need to unwind before picking up the reins again. For another family the husband needed to quickly resume his role. He felt he no longer had a place in his own home when she carried on as she had been while they were apart. One wife whose husband was gone frequently for short periods found that the children were confused by the role shifts. It was necessary for her to continue making the decisions and disciplining the children for the first twenty-four hours or so after his return. This gave the children a sense of security in an otherwise disrupted schedule.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally, Work--Cross Culturally Tagged With: fear, planning, roles, sleeping

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