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Peter's Wife

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Bone Tired

It’s Monday morning and I am tired. Not just the normal tired, but tired clear to the inside. I was not doing anything overly active this last weekend. I didn’t try to climb a mountain or run a marathon. I was just helping to lead a church family camp.

Is there something wrong with me? Am I ill? Am I unspiritual? Am I carrying unnecessary burdens?

Have you ever felt this way? Of course you have. Who am I talking to! Wives, mothers, cross cultural workers. Are we doing something wrong? Is God being mean to us, giving us too much to do in too little time? The enemy would like us to think so.

His goal is make us ineffective in any way possible. Sometimes he just takes advantage of our physical weakness, adding depression to physical exhaustion. Sometimes he plays on our own unrealistic expectations, nudging us to think we are somehow deficient servants of the Most High God. And sometimes he accuses God to us. He tries the same lying tactics he used with Eve, hoping we will turn our backs on God because He is a hard task master. “Any boss is better than this boss,” he whispers.

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Filed Under: Attitudes & Emotions, Work--Cross Culturally Tagged With: exhausted, unrealistic expectations

Most Dangerous Times

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Do you know your dangerous times? Everybody has them. Moreover,  if we live and work outside our home culture, we face special dangers. Parents and friends feel concerned for our health and safety. That’s a good thing. Like the Randy Newman song, says, “It’s a Jungle Out There.” It is great to know that people who love us pray for us. Who knows where we would be if they didn’t.

Sometimes the dangers become more acute, more threatening.  Recently I received an email from a PW asking for prayer because her host country is about to crumble. General strikes, mobs, rioting- turmoil everywhere.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally, Spiritual Life Tagged With: danger, exhausted, waiting

Expectations and Burnout

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Sue Eenigenburg & Robynn Bliss introduce a new resource for Women in Cross-Cultural Ministry, their new book, Expectations and Burnout: Women Surviving the Great Commission.

Everyone has expectations. Women in cross-cultural ministry are no exception. They usually go overseas with extremely high, if not unrealistic, expectations of themselves. Using data from surveys and research to form the basis for the book, Sue and Robynn not only explore expectations women workers might have of themselves, but also expectations they might have of their agencies, sending churches, co-workers, host culture and God.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally Tagged With: burnout, exhausted, expectation

Quiet Soul

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“You will find rest for your soul!” A bit of scripture. A declaration. A promise. This kept popping out from hiding in the corners of my mind.

My latest reading is Thomas Wingfold, Curate, by George MacDonald. One of the very first sermons this curate preached after beginning his real search for God was on the text in Matt. 11: 28-30, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (ESV)

We need rest for our souls when we are tired from carrying heavy loads. Cross-cultural workers have a lot of those. We can get exhausted from work, fretting, or disappointments. A heart-deadening load settles on us when someone we love rejects the God we love so much. We compare abundance and abject poverty and wonder how to make sense of it all. Even our spiritual service deadens us when it becomes heartless spiritual activity.

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Filed Under: Spiritual Life Tagged With: burdened, exhausted, lonely, quietness

Must Singles be Lonely?

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It was a frigid February morning as I arose and watched my breath hanging in the air before my eyes. I knew today’s priority had to be finding kerosene to heat my apartment. Oil delivery to Armenia had been limited this winter making kerosene purchases an exhausting hide-n-seek game. As I ate my chilly goat cheese and flatbread a host of thoughts joined me at the breakfast table; I really don’t like eating alone. Does anyone know my struggle? What if I freeze to death? Must I always be brave? Why do I have to do this alone? Who can help me? Where are my students when I need them? Why don’t I have a husband? Why won’t Thomas ask me out? Suddenly I was astounded at how a simple lack of kerosene led to utter loneliness and sadness.

Serving single on the foreign field has numerous benefits of ease, simplicity, flexibility, time and exciting adventurous possibilities. Singles tend to learn new languages, develop national friends and adapt to culture, more quickly and smoothly. Housing and travel options tend to be greater and expenses fewer.

But as in most things in life many pluses often include minuses. The solo servant needs to be aware of and prepared for periods of emotional and spiritual loneliness. I believe for many of us single workers, loneliness is not a constant state of being but more a feeling which comes in seasons and waves.

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Filed Under: Life--Cross culturally, Single Women Tagged With: accountability, exhausted, lonely, planning

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