It’s almost Valentine’s Day, the day we celebrate love. So it’s a good time to think about our husband and our home. At Valentine’s Day we usually think about romance, gifts, or special meals. But instead, let’s look at the atmosphere of our home. Is it a peaceful, joyful, welcoming place for our husband? What can we do to make it a refuge and a place full of love? If Valentine’s Day is about gifts of love, this could be the best gift of all.
Proverbs 14:1 tells us, “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.”
There are many ways we can build our home. When we dust and clean and declutter, we make our home pleasant. When we cook nutritious and appetizing meals, we make our home satisfying. But we can do more than chores to build our home. The attitudes we practice affect the atmosphere.
Let’s look at four different attitudes that affect the atmosphere of our homes.
Contentment with the home God has provided us will surely make our home a pleasant place.
A friend told me recently that she wasted two of the three years she was here in beautiful Virginia grumbling and complaining about being here and longing for her former home. I knew she was miserable, because she looked miserable! You can’t hide the grumbles. I’m sure the atmosphere of her home was not pleasant for her husband or children. How much happier her home would have been if she could have thanked God for where she was and trusted Him. Maybe by comparison her home here was not so big or beautiful, but it could have been pleasant if she had been content.
As women building homes in different cultures, with very different climates, customs, and conveniences, we have a choice to make, will we make this place home or will we live in constant discontent?
A home full of contentment is a pleasant place to be. Our husband and children will “catch” our attitude and others will enjoy spending time with us.
A house full of peace is a place to rest.
Isa. 32:18 promises that God’s people “will live in peaceful dwelling places, in secure homes, in undisturbed places of rest.” A house full of strife is a stressful place, but a house full of peace is a restful place.
We often link peace with quiet. But peace is not always the absence of activity or noise. If that were the case, most of us living overseas would never have any peace. Sometimes the most restful thing we can do is to enjoy a romp with the children, or sing a song together at the top of our voices.
Peace has more to due with the lack of tension. One tension that can build gradually is unforgiveness. Sometimes little things just pile up. A small thing happens and we don’t realize we need to forgive. One little thing piles on another and soon we find ourselves irritable.
Mercy goes a long way to making our homes restful. None of us lives up to our best image of ourselves. If we are ready to forgive with a heart full of mercy, it makes it so much easier for others in our family to forgive us when we fail.
Peace fills our hearts again as we forgive. How wonderful, how beautiful when we get along. When we can fill our homes with mercy, peace will be the result. There we will find rest. Let His peace fill your heart and you will find rest for your soul.
Joy overflows to everyone around us.
Hate those lines around your eyes and mouth? Don’t! A nice set of crow’s feet and rows of parentheses around our mouth will be the marks of a heart full of joy and lots of smiles and laughter. We all benefit from a good belly laugh everyday. Take the time to see the humor in your surroundings. Share a laugh with your family. If you need a jumpstart, go to: The Funny Bone
Joy is much deeper than humor and laughter, however. Romans 15:13 tells us as we trust the God of hope, He fills us with joy and peace. Don’t neglect your time with the God of hope. He knows how to fill us with joy unspeakable and full of glory.
Love, of course is the overall atmosphere we want in our homes.
Paul talks about these attitudes like articles of clothing. In The Message translation of Colossians 3:14, Paul says, “And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.”
When we teach on marriage and family, we usually ask the participants to think about something they are not now doing, or not doing enough, that would show their love for their spouse. The answers breakdown into several categories: acts of service, demonstrations of affection, time together, and meaningful communication. How would you and your spouse answer that question?
We also encourage people to ask the question: “What can I do to help?” That really is love’s question. In Fiddler on the Roof, Tevya asks Golda, “Do you love me?” She talks about all the things she has done for him over the years: cook his food, wash his clothes, raise five daughters. When he presses her for an answer, she finally says, “I suppose I do.” They say together, “It doesn’t change a thing, but even so, after 25 years, it’s nice to know.”
So for this Valentine’s Day, do something romantic! And why not check out the atmosphere in your home, too. Even if there’s not a big change you need to make, perhaps there’s some fine tuning you could do that would make your home more enjoyable and let your husband know how much you love him. Contentment, peace, joy and love are wonderful gifts to give our husband this Valentine’s Day